Periodic Poetry: An Unstable Collection
Also: science. Real science.
Dear teacher,
I know what you're up against.
Your schedule is packed. Your kids are fried. Your admin just handed you another acronym. And now you're expected to do the chemistry-IS-fun dance.
You could assign the standard packet. You could dig through Pinterest and hope. You could download a clip-art worksheet with fluorescent green fonts and pray it doesn't summon a demon.
Or…
You could hand your students a poem so strange, so smart, so disgustingly fun that they're still quoting it three units later.
What This Actually Is:
Periodic Poetry: An Unstable Collection is a full-color, illustrated book of wildly clever poems — one for each element in groups 1–18 — written for humans with brains, curiosity, and a warped sense of humor.
But in the Educators' Edition, you don't just get the poems. You get an entire plug-and-play teaching toolkit.
Your Complete Teaching Toolkit
No prep. No busywork. Just deep learning disguised as chaos.
🎨 Watercolor Illustrations
Hypnotize even your most distractible students
📚 Done-for-You Flashcards
All 88 elements, print-ready
✏️ Editable Versions
Customize everything to your class
🎯 BINGO Game Sets
Chem 1 focus + blank template
🧠 300+ Page Decoder Ring
Sound brilliant without lifting a finger
🧩 Build-a-Table Poster Kit
Collaborative periodic table puzzle
📋 Sub-Ready Lesson Plan
Print and leave for disappearing days
🏆 Unlimited Bragging Rights
Be the teacher with the secret weapon
The Vibe Is:
Shel Silverstein meets Bill Nye. But make it unhinged. And illustrated in hypnotic watercolor.
Real Poem Topics Include:
- Radioactive girls
- CIA conspiracies
- Definitely werewolves
- Elements named for goblins
- And yes, flatulence gets its poetic due
"Wait. So I just... buy this and my chem unit is handled?"
Yes. That's exactly what happens.
This is 97 done-for-you lessons. You'll walk into class with your coffee still hot. Your students will ask if you have more poems. And you'll feel like the cool witch-scientist you were always meant to be.
Why It Works (Even If You're Not a "Fun Teacher")
Because it's rooted in real science. Because it respects your time. Because it doesn't talk down to kids. And because weird sticks.
This isn't classroom theater. It's strategically chaotic learning.
The Decoder Ring gives you line-by-line breakdowns of every poem:
- Science facts
- Historical references
- Discussion questions (and answers)
- Answers to every "Wait, what does that mean?" question you'll get
You'll look like you did ten hours of research. (It only takes flipping a page.)
What You Get – All for $20
- Digital version of Periodic Poetry: An Unstable Collection
- 88 done-for-you flashcards (print-ready)
- 88 editable flashcards (customizable)
- 3 BINGO sets (full table, Chem 1, and blank)
- Decoder Ring Teacher Guide (300+ pages)
- Build-a-Table Poster Kit
- Print-and-Leave Sub Plan (fully scripted, zero-effort)
- Unlimited bragging rights
Why You (Specifically You) Need This
You want your students to remember this unit — not just survive it. You want your class to feel alive without burning yourself out. You want resources that are as smart and weird as you are.
And you're tired of clip-art shouting "SODIUM IS TABLE SALT!" like that's ever made a kid care.
Let's do it better.
Still thinking about it?
Here's what's not in this book:
No test prep strangle hold. No standards-based jargon. No exclamation-point-overloaded objectives.
Just unforgettable poems. Gorgeous art. And a strange, sly kind of magic that actually works.
Ready?
Grab the Educators' Edition for $20
And set your chemistry unit up to be the most memorable thing you teach all year.
ADD TO CART